12 July 2009
flickr photo by Karen from MichiganWhen I was a young girl, I grew up hearing a slew of words that are seldom found in our lexicon today -- salvation, redemption, atonement, ...-- because I grew up in a very religious home where the sun around which our daily lives revolved was the church we were a part of.
Over the years, I have changed my orbit quite a bit and moved away from this earlier world view. I am now more open and inclusive in my views of God, myself and the Universe. But my amazement at the mystery of these will never go away. If anything, I'm even more amazed!
Despite the fact that I rarely think in theological terms anymore, some of the words from that earlier lexicon still linger in the language by which I see and experience my world. And two of those words have come to my mind again and again over the past week. They are grace and mercy, and they go hand in hand.
What are grace and mercy, though? We use these terms all the time in daily little expressions: Mercy me. Lord, have mercy! Will you grace us with your presence? He handled that with such grace and dignity. But what do they mean when we use them together?
I was lucky a few years ago to have someone explain this to me: To receive grace is to receive a gift that you have done nothing to deserve. To receive mercy is to not receive the punishment that you definitely do deserve.
To speak more plainly, grace is the gift under the Christmas tree even though you've been nothing but naughty, the bonus in your salary even though you really came in too late in the year to qualify, the credit you get for work on a project you barely (if even) showed up for.
And mercy, mercy is the prosecutor deciding not to press charges, the alleviated sentence at a trial, the stay of execution the night a prisoner is to be hung.
Both of these, grace and mercy, are supreme gifts. They are also humbling. And when you receive them, if the eyes of your heart are open in any way, you thank your lucky stars for them.This is how I felt this past week when I had my life held up in high relief before my eyes like a topographical map: my highs and lows etched out in supreme clarity, my steps along the journey marked out in little red dots from one place to another. Some of what I saw I was proud of, but other things I saw gave me pause: bad turns, missteps, people hurt, friendships lost, loyalties betrayed. It was not pretty, and I felt sick to my stomach at some of what I saw, mortified, ashamed, and sorrowful above all.
At work in the middle of all this, however, were two little things called grace and mercy. The Universe had felt it fitting to give me this glimpse, painful though it was (a bit like Scrooge and his Christmas ghosts), and say to me, "All is not lost, CG. Let's make some changes." This was grace.
And then came mercy. As I turned to the people in my life whom I'd hurt and began to ask forgiveness, I saw over and over again love and acceptance. "Of course", "No worries", "Water under the bridge", "It's alright", "You're human. Everyone makes mistakes." "None of us is perfect." These are the words I have heard repeatedly over the last days, and my shame and sorrow have been transformed into humility and joy.
flickr photo by morrrganThe amazing thing about grace and mercy is that, when they are extended to you, it is that much easier to extend them to yourself. I have been able to say, "CG, I forgive you. Let's get on now with the business of living. Onward and upward."
I've discovered that they're not gifts you can hold onto and closet away, either. Once you've received them, you've got to hand them back out again and see the light on someone else's face as they realize they are loved and forgiven. At least, this is how I've felt.
So I share this post with you today as just one more way of shining some hope and light into your world, to remind those of you who might need it that all is not lost no matter how badly we might think we've screwed things up.
What about you?
Can you think of any times in your own life when you have received or seen grace and mercy in action?
What do you remember about these moments?
Are there times when you yourself have given these gifts?
Can you think of any times in your own life when you have received or seen grace and mercy in action?
What do you remember about these moments?
Are there times when you yourself have given these gifts?
Please feel welcome to share your stories here. I look forward to what you have to say.
Namaste and peace be with you,
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18 comments:
Hi Chania Girl,
Grace and mercy - they are beautiful actions when done from the heart. I know this couldn't have been easy (it wouldn't be for me, anyway) to go out and seek the mercy of others - so what you've done, I am so happy for you!
And when you receive these gifts, grace and mercy, they are indeed gifts that are so good to not hold onto, but to pass out to others! It's like a gift that keeps on giving...
Sure, I've had moments in my life where I'm proud of. And I have received grace and mercy - and it is moments like that which are so life-affirming for me. (and some I look back on from year past, and realize that it's only now I'm fully realizing how life-affirming this has been).
Chania Girl, thank you so much for sharing this, you are a gift and a light in my life.
This is truly beautiful, touching and inspiring. Thank you so much for writing this, and sharing it with us. This really touched me deeply.
Like Lance said, you are a gift and a light.
I'm hoping you've found a wellspring of peace as well as the gifts of grace and mercy.
I know it's been difficult for you to describe the events of the last month without being too specific, but you explained the concepts of grace and mercy beautifully, and those of us who don't know the details can empathise with the feelings that inspired you to write this.
CG, you are so courageous and I totally admire your honesty and openess. You are grace and mercy in action girl!
I love your blog because it's not regurgitated self help stuff. It's honest, authentic and inviting.
What you describe is what AA calls the fourth step. As a previous substance abuse counselor I witnessed lives change before my very eyes with grace and mercy.
You rock!
@Lance: Thank you, Lance, for the constant support and encouragement you give. I am glad that you could relate to my story. Yes, life-affirming things sometimes do take time to show up ... well, maybe not show up, but sometimes it takes us a while to see how certain events in our lives do so. And I'm glad that you have experienced this affirmation.
@Jay: Jay, it means a lot to me that this touched you. Thank you for sharing this with me. I am wishing you all the best on this journey that you are on, fellow traveler.
@Janice: Janice, YES, I have found a wellspring of peace and joy, and I'm so grateful: my cup runneth over! It has been a difficult month (2 months really) in soooooo many ways. It is true, I have not been able to go into much detail, but I do hope by simply sharing parts of my story that others can be encouraged wherever they may be on this journey we're on. I'm so glad you and I are "sharing the journey." Much love.
@Sami: Sami, I'm so glad to see you today. Your comments always brighten my day. Thank you for these kind words. I hope you feel encouraged today by what I wrote.
@Tess: It's funny you should mention the 4th step, Tess, because that's what I've been telling people I've been doing. Sometimes it just needs to be done. It is very freeing, even when I don't hear an "I forgive you." Fortunately, grace and mercy have been abundant, and I am full of gratitude. Thank you for continuing to stop by and supprort me with your words.
It is often very hard to forgive oneself, but once the project has begun it is such a joyous consequence of our actions. Grace and Mercy - The names of two of my Great Aunts! Our family was full of reminders of the power of these words, though as I heard their stories I always thought Grace should have been Mercy and visa versa!!
Thank you for sharing your story it is inspiring.
CG,
This was so beautiful -- I am bookmarking it for prosperity. I love the definitions of Grace and Mercy, and particularly like how they're put in layman's terms.
I like to think that I have a lot of grace...definitely not all the time, but a lot of the time. I'm a big believer of "kindness as a philosophy." Again, I'm not trying to say that I practice it all the time, it's just something that I aspire to...
You are brave and courageous in how you're living right now, and also for blogging about it. Your honesty is refreshing and also a big eye-opener for myself. It's like a metaphorical tap on the shoulder, reminding me to be better. Thanks CG!
Hi CG!
I have had the blessing of receiving Grace and Mercy and I truly hope I've given it back to others. This was indeed a joy to read today. :)
@Patricia: I love that your aunts were named Grace and Mercy: for a long time I have loved the name Grace as a "girl" name ... but I'm not a fan of its Greek equivalent = Hara. :( Thank you, Patricia, for your comment and encouraging me. Am so glad that this was an inspiring post for you.
@Kirwin: It is always a treat for me when you stop by, and I'm so glad to see you today. Thank you for your continued support and encouragement. I'm very glad that you liked the definitions of grace and mercy that I tried to give. I think you ARE grace most of the time ... at least that is what I see, Graceful Creative. You are beautiful and refreshing to me, too.
@Tabitha: Hi, Tabitha. Am so glad this post brought some joy into your world today. I think you do give back Grace and Mercy on a daily basis. Thank you! :)
This is a beautiful and honest post...like Tess says "because it's not regurgitated self help stuff."
Grace and Mercy...profound words and experiences. Honestly, I have a hard time with the word mercy. I don't know why, but I don't like it. Maybe because of the theological tone. But it's also negative to me. And I don't think I have ever used that word in my life...odd?
I like forgiveness a whole lot better!
@Caroline: I know exactly where you're coming from, Caroline. I've had the same response to that word, and I prefer forgiveness, too. But there's a streak in me that likes to take old, meaningful words and present them again ~ the same streak that wants "plight thee my troth" to be included in my wedding vows somehow. :) So glad you stopped by today. Is always good to "see" you.
You have done an excellent job in helping us to raise our awareness of grace and mercy. May we all think and practice grace and mercy in our daily moments.
@Mark: It was lovely to see you today, Mark. Am very glad that you enjoyed the post. It was my intent to reintroduce these two little concepts again in a way I hoped wasn't laden down with religious overtones, because they are really everyday attitudes and actions we can incorporate into our lives. It sounds like you understand that, and I'm glad for it. Have a wonderful, grace-filled day today.
This was a beautiuful and deep reflection on the two mysterious words in our vocabulary indeed.
What I loved most about this post, was how you explained, or how it was explained to you what "grace" and "mercy" are.
I too was brought up in a religious home, and today embrace the iniversal spirituality of all.
Grace and mercy for me today are all around, we just have to be open to them...but of course it helps to know what they really are first.
Thanks :)
@Evita: Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Evita. I liked the way grace and mercy were explained to me, too. It really clarified things for me. You are right when you say it's wonderful to realize that grace and mercy are still alive and well in this well world, but so much easier to recognize them when we know what we're looking for. So good to see you today.
I have made some pretty big changes in my life lately. I have made a point to look for and be open to the signs of grace everywhere- daily I have been able to notice these signs and it has helped me so much!
I too have left the dogma of the 'church'- the oceans and the woods are my 'church'. However, this does not mean I am not close to God - or that even I do not love Jesus (someone who loves Jesus but is not 'religious' not too common I know)
I believe that God loves everyone regardless of religion that God's grace is available to everyone -which makes it not possible to be religious I suppose:) Ok I am rambling now....
I am glad I came across this post today. Your writing is very inspiring - thank you so much for sharing!
Blessings!
@Angie: Hi, Angie. I'm so glad you came across this today and took the time to leave a comment. Isn't it wonderful to be able to look around and see the signs of grace in the world? I agree with you and also believe that God's grace is available for everyone, even when it's hard for me to believe that. :) Thank you for your comment ... and for the compliment about my writing. I hope you'll visit again. :)
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